Boy, the way you blowing up my phone won't make me put my clothes on faster.

[veebox]

BASICALLY PHONE SEX AND SEXTING THREADS ALL GO HERE.

Comments

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

...was it really that hot i mean that zipper's pretty fucked now, i'm not sure if i want to ask dad to fix it for me.

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

dude i made you so horny you broke your pants

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

i wanted to suck all the fluid out of you through your cock it was absurd

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

bet dirk could fix it if you asked

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

yes, that is definitely what busting open my pants with a boner would mean, ace detective strider.

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

wait really? do you still want to, i'd be all up for that!

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

your brother is a saint. saint dirk, the saint of sewing boner-destroyed pants.

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

also, uh, no intention to be pushy about the sucking my fluids from my dick thing earlier! it's up to you, man.

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

emphasis on the 'because of me' bit, dude

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

anytime you want a blowjob, just say the word

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

the word is python btw

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

i'm think i'm starting to see that you don't know how horny you make me. well, now you do, i mean, it's zipper-destroying levels of "oh mr. strider i want you so bad".

(1/2)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

python?

(2/2)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

oh! python!

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

seriously it blows my fucking mind
i'm still not over the fact that you want to kiss my face over here

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

ding ding ding egbert got the joke congratulations here is your free car complete with supermodel
the supermodel is me in a sparkly red dress

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

dude i love kissing your face!
urgh when are you free next?
i'm uh...
getting a little antsy now, i guess.

(1/1)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

oh my god.
you are so weird, dave.

(1/2)

[knightofcool]

feeling is 100 fucking percent mutual
having wet dreams about the way our glasses bump all the damn time

(2/2)

[knightofcool]

wait hold up
what does antsy mean in this situation
does it live next to mister horny in boner city

(1/1)

[knightofcool]

you love it

(1/2)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

it's been living next to mister horny in boner city for a long time
and mister horny has to tell it to turn the music down a lot.

(2/2)

[putthebunnyinthebox]

dude i'm
we both agree we're sexually attracted to each other and that my boners caused by you break pants, right?
can we...y'know...
...this is hard over text.
(psst so am i.)